Sunday, February 3, 2013

Who's On Your Team?

The other day Shane shared with me an article on a talk given by Mitt Romney at BYU. I can't remember the details but essentially the talk was on core values. When Mitt had formed his company with several other men they found themselves at each others throats because they all wanted different things out of the company. They met with a business psychologist who talked them through their issues and at the end of the week told them this: When you are living out of sink with your core values you will be more stressed and unhappy and unfulfilled, no matter what your success, than if you live in sink with your core values.  "So how do we figure out what our core values are?" they wanted to know. Pick the 5 people you most admire in life and look at their values. This is how you'll know what your core values are.

I told Shane that this exercise is always boring because inevitably everyone has the same answers: Jesus Christ, Prophets, Abe Lincoln, Parents, Spouses…with maybe some small variation of that.  So he said, "Okay. Let's make it more interesting. Who'd be on your team if we rule out family and religious leaders?"

Now THAT is more interesting and a lot harder to do.  We spent the next hour picking our "team". When we picked someone we had to say why we picked them and what value they represented to us that we wanted to achieve.  So….here's my team.

Dieter F. Uchtdorf-- Okay, I know we made a rule of no religious leaders. But we both agreed to allow ONE apostle.  President Uchtdorf was my easy and obvious choice. His ability to speak to the heart of women is incredible to me. He has such a great sense of humor and love of life, while at the same time he can really drive home the importance of a certain principle. Pretty much all of my favorite conference talks of the last 4 years are from him. He rules and he was the first pick on my team.

Mitt Romney-- My second pick. I know it's ironic that it was his article that led us to talk about this, but I really wanted him on my team. His ability to lead and organize on a large scale is something I really admire. I also love that he didn't back down from being Mormon throughout his campaign, despite that massive amounts of pressure that were put on him. I also believe, without a shadow of a doubt, that he only ran for President because he knew he could help our country. Not because he wanted fame or laud or honor…he just wanted to help. To me that is incredible. There are so many stories I've heard about him, through the grapevine, of quiet kindness and goodness. I also love how faithful and devoted he is to his wife. He's just a good man.

Stephanie Nielsen-- My third pick. I was really happy with this pick. She is such an amazing example of overcoming adversity. But I think more than that, I really relate to the way she is as a mother. The value and importance she puts on her kids and on her role as a mom really speak to me. She sees the joy in the little details of motherhood and I'm grateful for her reminders of that. I am also impressed with her as a missionary. She has taken every opportunity she can to share the gospel and I love that. She is truly an amazing woman.

Merie Kamerer-- My fourth pick. Merie is the Relief Society president in our ward. And she works endlessly for the women in our area. But that is not why she is on my list. Merie is one of the most genuinely kind and caring people I have ever known. There is a story that will forever stand out in my mind to illustrate this truth. Last summer Owen was on a "selling" kick. Early in the morning, before swim team, he would drag a table outside and set up his sale. He was selling pictures for awhile. $1 per picture. Sweet Merie, unsuspectingly, came running around our block on her morning jog and came across Owen's sale. It was about this time that I happened to glance out the window. There Owen was, standing tall and explaining each picture to her and Merie was listening intently. I could tell from across the street she made Owen feel important, like what he was doing had value. She ran home to get money. And then she tried to run past Owen for like a month after that, just to see if he had another "sale" set up. I was thinking how I'd be avoiding that route if I were her, and here she was trying specifically to run past him. I hope to have such goodness some day.

Mike Oliver-- Last of all is Mike Oliver, the principle of my kids' school. Anybody that knows this school and how it is run knows that he is unique in his approach. And they also know that this uniqueness is what makes their school the amazing place it is. Mike is respectful of everyone…from the best teachers, to the smallest kindergartner, to the janitor, to the crossing guards. He treats them all with the utmost respect. He exudes happiness and love of life. He takes his job of watching out for our kids quite seriously and values parents and students alike. He constantly shows his appreciation to parents for entrusting him with their children and you always feel valued and welcomed in the school. His attitude is always so positive and the entire tone of the school is set in the right direction by him. I try to adopt his philosophies and policies with my swim team. I can't imagine taking my kids anywhere else.

So there's my team. I guess if I had to break down each person into a core value it might look something like this:

Uchtdorf- Understanding
Romney- Honorable
Nielsen- Displays the Divinity of Motherhood
Kamerer- Genuine Goodness
Oliver- Leads with Love

Here was Shane's list--
Jeffery R. Holland
Robert Krogh (an old mission companion)
Ronald Regan
Tea Cup (fictional character from "Their Eyes Were Watching God")
Merril Dayton (my ex-husbands dad…how awesome is that!)

It was a really fun conversation and took a lot of thought, but it was worth it. I think it's important to figure out what you value and why and try to align your life with your core values so you are living in sink.

So…who would be on your team?

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Just in case anyone is wondering what traits I admire in my picks:

Elder Holland: ability to speak to the heart
Robert Krogh: humility despite considerable gifts
Ronald Reagan: faithfulness to his wife, and desire to teach his children long after they were out of the home
Teacup: exuberance for life
Merill Dayton: steadiness despite turmoil

Unknown said...

AWESOME! Love this whole exercise and your picks AND your rationals behind them. And thank you, Shane, for posting your picks! ;) I just said to dad (I read it to him), I'd like to know shanes reasons/traits. :)

I'm going to have to give this some thought. I've discovered already that I've got a lot of things that need changing and fixing in my life. I'm pretty sure I'd run the other direction to avoid a salesman, even one as cute as Owen.

Thanks for sharing your awesomeness (both of you) once again.

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